I dozed off with more fear and anxiety than I had in years. I wasn’t sure if he was going to keep it a secret, or was going to let everyone know I sucked his dick. I didn’t know if he was going to want more, or would want me to do it again. Would he offer to suck mine? And if he did, was I even ready for that? And would I like it? All I could comprehend at that moment was I had experienced something I had never done and in the midst of it all, I kind of liked it. It surely wasn’t in the best place, at the best time, or even with the best person I could have chosen. But I had given a blow job!
I didn’t see Chuck for a few days after that. I know I was keeping my distance, maybe he was keeping his. When we finally crossed paths again, we acted like nothing had happened and, in all reality, went back to the friendship we had without “that” ever being brought up again.
But that experience with him, right, wrong, or indifferent, opened up a door for me, I never expected and led me to a lifestyle I never imagined would have happened. Months after, I found myself in the beginning phases of fantasizing about sucking dick. I can’t quite say for certain it was him in all the fantasies, or just guys in general, but as the years went on and the fantasies grew stronger, I’d find myself jacking off thinking about giving head. Which led me to find ways to satisfy those needs. Even more wild thoughts about being fucked came into my mind.
Even though I had girlfriends and a very hot, passionate sex life, at times, when I was alone at night my focus would shift from them to being with a man and sucking him off, just like I had done to Chuck. I even started swallowing my own cum, just so I knew what it was like to swallow it. Which led to more moments of pleasure, desires, and solo sexual play.
I’ll tell you more about my homosexual experiences in the next chapter. But I want everyone to know that this was a slow progression, from new and different porn movies, to toys, to dildos, to new male and transgendered lovers which have led me to suck more dick, during those relationships, than any amount of pussy I ever ate. And I couldn’t imagine not being without my current boyfriend and his cock for even a minute. But the trail getting there was filled with adventure, big hard dicks, lots and lots of cum, and some phenomenal anal sex. As the title says, I turned myself into a cock sucking fag. And I mean it!