I want to go over the dating rules. Leandra is a good girl, a virgin. She’s going to stay a virgin until she gets married. Sherry and Shannon are her chaperones. They’ll make sure she doesn’t have sex. Wanda will be Larry’s emergency assistant.”
I asked, “What?”
She explained, “Sherry and Shannon will help your dates go smoother, too, but at least one of them will escort Leandra at all times. If she’s sleeping, one or both will be in bed with her. If she goes to the bathroom, one of them will pass her the toilet paper.
Wanda will escort Larry, in case he has an emergency in his pants and needs a vagina. Wanda will be there for him 24/7, but only if it’s an emergency.
The rest of the time, Leandra will prove she’ll be a good wife by opening her mouth and swallowing any time Larry feels a desire to jack off. Leandra will also prove she’s a good girl and good potential wife by using the poop hole loophole. She’ll stay a virgin by asking him to do her ass at the end of each date.”
My eyes must have been the size of saucers as I asked, “REALLY?”
Leandra sweetly said, “I want you to be happy with me. Sherry and Shannon have helped me practice with toys in my butt for a few months. I think I’m ready.”
Marissa French kissed me briefly, then stood up. “She stays a virgin, but enjoy her mouth and ass. If you need pussy, that’s why Wanda’s around. Ehlonna and I will meet you on your way to the office in two days. Your entertainment for tomorrow will bring you breakfast.”
Ehlonna said, “Everybody heard and understands, but I think we should make sure. Stand in front of Leandra, Larry.”
I did, and she continued, “Sherry, Shannon, help her give Larry a pants emergency.”
Leandra unzipped me and pulled out my penis. She said, “Wow! It’s SO BIG!”
The three high school seniors took turns licking and sucking. Leandra looked quite excited. Sherry and Shannon didn’t complain, but looked like they were doing an unpleasant chore. The three were inexperienced and unskilled, but their tongues and lips still brought me closer and closer to climax. So, SO close!
Ehlonna cruelly said, “Hands and mouths off, girls! What do you do, Larry?”
I nearly screamed, “WANDA! Quick! Lean over the table! PLEASE!”
I ran behind her and lifted her skirt. I was a little surprised, but happy to see she wore no panties. I stuffed myself in and blasted a wad into her after only a dozen strokes.
Ehlonna smiled. “There, disaster averted. We’ll see you in a couple days. It’s 7:30pm, so you have 12 hours. The girls need to leave for their first class at 7:30 in the morning. Have fun.” She and her sister smiled and held hands as they left.
As I pulled out, I said, “Thanks, Wanda. You’re a life safer!” I kissed her on the cheek. She took a baby wipe from her purse and started to clean herself, as she quietly told me, “You’re supposed to love the blonde in the middle. I’m just here for fucking. They pay me either way.”
“Still, thank you.”
She yawned and asked, “Can I sleep in one of these bedrooms? Somebody kept me up late last night. A couple of blonde somebodies who left a minute ago.” She winked.
“Sure, take the guest room on the right.”
“Just wake me up if you want more. Or don’t wake me up, and do me anyway.” She smiled as she laid on the bed.
I walked back to the girls on the sofa, and Leandra said, “We should get to know each other. What do you like to do?”
I answered, “Sex, and making lots of money.”
Her next question was simple but made me think very hard. “Anything else? There has to be something you do just for fun?”
“Ahhh…”
She asked, “What was the last thing you enjoyed that wasn’t about sex or money?”
“Um … I had Cornish hen with rice and vegetables for dinner.”
“Food doesn’t count. Do you have any hobbies, anything you like to watch on TV?”
“I don’t watch TV, I’m too busy. I … I don’t remember anything else fun. It’s been a LONG time.”
She pointed a finger at me and got a stern look on her face. “Mr. Larry Tomkins, you are in DESPERATE need of a happiness transplant.” She leaned over and blew a raspberry on my cheek, then tickled me.
I laughed and hugged her, then kissed her on the lips.
She smiled and kissed me back briefly. “I prescribe one Ditzie Day. We need a Ditzie Dash, girls.” The other two cheered.
I wondered aloud, “What’s a ditzie dash?”
“It’s like a munchie run, except we get some silly and stupid things to cheer us up. We usually get cake and some junk food too.”
I said, “Sounds good, let’s go.”
Two hours later we returned from several stores and a gas station with a random assortment of … junk. There was no better word for it. Sherry wore an enormous pair of sunglasses and an inner tube with a unicorn head on it, which was intended for swimming pools. Shannon had on a dozen Mardis Gras necklaces, a plastic princess tiara meant for kindergartners, and waved a plastic wand with a star on the end of it. Leandra wore a hard hat, like construction workers, a blue cookie monster sweatshirt, and a frilly pink ballerina skirt over her jeans. She had convinced me to get a hat that was mostly yarn and old beer cans. She also got me a yellow rubber duckie, which she put on a string to make it a necklace.
Our other ‘prizes’ were a cheap box of red wine, a small birthday cake, and several bags of salty snacks.
Leandra said, “Nobody open any food or drinks yet. Do we have the sacred Ditzy movies?”
Shannon held them up. “Yup, ‘Dumb and Dumber’ and ‘Weekend at Bernies’.”
Leandra ordered, “Start up Bernie, and get your glitter.”
As the movie started, I wondered aloud, “Glitter?”
The three stood up with handfuls of glitter and slowly turned in circles while they blew the multi-colored metallic powder all over the place. Leandra said, “I declare Ditzy Day open!”
They threw the last of the glitter upwards, getting it all over our hair and clothes.
I was getting frustrated with the 18-year-olds acting like preschoolers. I also hated anything being dirty or disorganized. I objected loudly, “Why are you making a huge mess!”
Leandra sweetly replied, “There are sparkles and pretty colors everywhere. It looks like a fun place now. Is it hurting anybody?”
“Well…”
She kissed the tip of my nose. “You need to live a little.” She handed me a small container of glitter.
I shrugged mentally and said, “Why not?” I poured it in my hand and blew glitter around the room.
They cheered again and Sherry said, “Speaking of dumber, pass out the wine. Do you have any cigarettes, Shannon?”
Shannon handed one to each of the other girls. “Sure. My brother’s nerdy college friends buy ‘em for me. All I need to do is show them my boobs.”
I saw Leandra filling small foam cups with the cheap wine. I was about to tell them not to smoke, but figured, “Why not?” I brought out a ceramic bowl as an ashtray. I watched them sucking their cigarettes, and was reminded of them sucking my penis only a few hours before.
Sherry said, “The last two things about Ditzy Day are eating the cake, and the Ditzy Drop. You can only eat the cake using chips or your mouth. No utensils or fingers. When you finish a drink, you have to drop a piece of clothing, that’s the Ditzy Drop.”