“Thanks, mate,” said the mechanic. He knew Ryan wasn’t necessarily finding the exact words he wanted, but he knew what he was trying to say. “That means a lot. But not everyone’s gonna be as understanding as you. I’m probably gonna lose some friends. Some people are gonna think I’ve been lying to them, but if I’ve been lying to anyone, it’s been myself.”
“Look,” said Ryan, “to be honest, I’m gonna miss Abby, but most of all, I’m gonna miss the Mack-Abby unit. You two were a team, and it’s gonna feel strange for a while. I’d like to still be mates with her, but I also know it won’t be the same as it was before. She won’t be coming to the pub or to backyard barbeques with you anymore, and that’s gonna feel strange for a while. Things are gonna be complicated now, and I don’t know what I should say to her next time I see her, like for instance if I bump into her at the shops or whatever. I mean, I’ve known her for as long as I’ve known you, and it’s always felt to me like you two were meant to be together forever. I truly hope she’s OK.” He paused for a second. “Sorry, mate, I know that was a ramble, but ultimately this isn’t about me or any of your friends, I’m sure we’ll all cope. I can only guess how tough this has been and probably still is for you, but you’ve always been a brave motherfucker, and if being true to yourself means you lose friends, then maybe those cunts were never your friends in the first place.”
Mack nodded in agreement. He remembered the emo had almost said the exact same thing to him. He and Ryan raised their beer glasses and clinked. “Thanks for saying that, mate. I really appreciate it. And if you see Abby around the traps, maybe just try to talk to her like you always have. I know it won’t be easy, but I’m sure she’d appreciate the effort. I will too.”
Ryan nodded in understanding, taking a sip of his beer. “OK, so what’s he like?” he asked, turning discussion away from the mechanic’s ex. “Like I said before, I imagined you on the arm of a trophy wife with huge tits and a juicy can, but that fantasy’s gone out the window now. I’m not into guys, but I’m still curious.”
“You’ve already met him,” said Mack, his face betraying half a smile. “A few months ago. A couple of times, I think.”
Ryan’s mind whirred in reverse. “Hang on a sec. Not that Asian cunt with the pierced face and the black fingernails?”
“Yeah, that’s him.”
“Wait, but I thought he was your father’s cousin’s sister’s brother’s former roommate?”
Mack laughed, remembering the insane bullshit story they spun that night at the Regatta Hotel. “I met him on grindr. Well, to be more accurate, he met me. We weren’t together then. I guess we were still in the early stages of getting to know each other.”
“I remember he came to the rugby with us one night,” Ryan remembered. “He had no idea about the game. I remember you telling us he was a distant relative, or a friend of a relative, or … fuck, I can’t remember, the story kept changing. Anyway, you said you were looking after him until he found a place of his own. And then I remember we were sinking piss at the Regatta one night and he was there. I assumed he’d found a place to live by then, because he wasn’t there with you. I remember waving him over and you freaking out, so now I understand why you seemed so awkward. I remember he was with a sexy goth chick with a huge rack. She couldn’t keep her hands off him.” The penny finally dropped. “Oh, wait, OK, now it all makes sense. He’s the guy you’re with, and she’s the goth chick you were talking about. Yeah, she was fucking hot.”
Mack sipped his beer. “Abby doesn’t like this, by the way.”
Ryan nearly jumped off his chair. “Fuck, you told her?”
“Yeah, I had dinner with her a few weeks ago. She seemed to be OK with the idea of me fucking a guy my own age, but when I mentioned he was half my age, she …”
“He definitely looked young,” interjected Ryan. “I just assumed he must’ve been a bit older than he looked.”
The mechanic shook his head. “I’m 42,” he stated, “and he’s 21.”
“Fuck, dude, that’s … wait, so his friend, the goth chick, is the same age? … fuck, dude, you came in the mouth of a hot 21 year old goth? Fuck, I’d sacrifice the little toe on my right foot to have an opportunity to do that …”
Mack interrupted his mate’s fantasy. “But do you reckon it’s strange?”
“Is *what* strange?”
“That I’m having sex with someone young enough to be my son?”
“He’s legal, right?”
“Yeah, and he’s had way more sexual partners than I’ve ever had.” The mechanic took a deep breath. “I know this must be uncomfortable for you to hear, but I’m really attracted to him. I worried for so long that this was just a crazy midlife crisis, and that in a year’s time, I’d regret everything and I’d go crawling back to Abby trying to pick up where we left off, but he and I have a connection I never expected to have. It’s not just sex. I love cooking for him and watching him eat. He reckons I’m the best chef in the world and that I should open a restaurant. That’ll never happen, but it’s so fucking nice to hear. He’s a funny cunt with a wicked sense of humour. I enjoy watching him trying to decide what he wants to do with his life. He’s got way more choices than I ever had or wanted, and I’m curious about where he’s gonna take himself. We listen to music together, and he’s interested in me as a person. I learn shit from him, I feel protective about him, and his body feels warm in my bed.” He sipped his beer. “Do you remember what it feels like when you meet someone new, and everything about them inflames your senses? Do you remember how you felt when you first met your wife? It feels like everything’s on fire, right? I had that feeling with Abby once upon a time, but it was so long ago. I mean, fuck, we were still in high school. The fire burned strong for a long time, but in our case, I guess it eventually ran out of fuel.” He paused for a second, taking another sip of beer. “It’s nobody’s fault. It is what it is. And remember, she was the one who let me go. I still love her, and I always will, but it’s different now.”
Ryan wasn’t quite sure how to respond to his mate’s deeply emotional confession. His phone pinged in his pocket and the vibrations distracted him. “Park that thought for a sec.” He read the message before walking to the main entrance of the pub. The street looked like a river. “Pissing down pretty hard out there,” he said, returning to his friend. “Officially got the day off tomorrow,” he said, pointing to his phone. “Golf course will be a wreck. Good thing we installed some additional drainage last winter, but tomorrow is dead. I had my alarm set for 6 o’clock tomorrow, but now I’m gonna have a sweet sleep-in.” He looked at his empty glass. “Gonna be a battle to get home through this weather, so maybe let’s have one more beer. What do you reckon?”
Mack nodded. “Thanks, mate. Yeah.” His garage was closed on Saturdays now. Work was still busy, but the peak had passed. He had no reason to get up early tomorrow.
On somewhat uncertain feet, Ryan made his way to the bar to buy two more beers.