A gay story: An Unexpected Submissive – 05 I was startled by the soft knock at my partially opened office door. I never expected anyone this time of day. I was even more surprised when I looked up to see Alexander standing in the doorway.
Over the past month, our routine together had been stable and comfortable. We always took meals together and were still going strong enjoying a minimum of four lengthy playdates a week. The more play time we spent together, the more we realized that our various interests overlapped. As we worked toward our second exhibition, we’d found that the combination of a lengthy period of emotional submission without touch combined with a few moments of quick and hard physical interaction like fast, aggressive fucking or several strokes of a whip could heighten the sensations offered by each method and we were loving the exploration of both.
For the past week however, he’d seemed more worn out than normal. He’d been unusually quiet during meals, often seeming distracted. He’d also asked to join me in my bed and fallen asleep quickly after each of our last five encounters. While this was one of his normal forms of after care, he typically mixed things up a bit with items like a long shower or leisurely desert together as well.
“This is a nice surprise. What can I do for you Alex?”
He looked drained and stressed; nearly ill. “White.”
I frowned and gestured to the chair across the desk. “Are you ok?”
He cringed as he spoke. “I need to take a week or so away for work.”
He ran his hand through his hair, clearly flustered. “I mean not away away, I just need to focus on work. This huge project is wrapping up. My deadline was supposed to be nearly a month out and they’ve moved it and now I have eight days and…”
I cut him off. “Completely understandable. This is your career and livelihood. That responsibility comes first.”
He looked unhappy but relieved. “Thank you Sir.”
I laughed softly. “No need for that during white Beautiful.”
“Habit, I suppose.” He grinned tiredly. “Plus, I like it.”
A shiver I hoped he hadn’t noticed ran through me.
I felt my brow furrow as I looked him over thoroughly. “You sort of look like shit.”
He laughed wearily. “I know.”
“Well. I would love it if you could join me for meals occasionally. If not, I would like to see you once a day, if possible, simply to check on your well-being.”
He nodded and looked as though he were nearly ready to cry.
“I’ll let Jacob know what is going on and either of us will be more than happy to offer any support we can. If you need us to bring food to your rooms, or yell at your boss, you just let us know.”
His exhausted grin was brief but seemed genuine.
“We’ll pick other things back up when it works for you.”
He sighed deeply in relief “Thank you so much. I really appreciate all that you do for me, and I really am sorry about this.”
I shook my head kindly. “No need to apologize for something that is out of your control Alex.”
He groaned as he stood. “Guess I have no excuse not to get back to it then. I’ll try to eat with you when I can.”
“I’d like that.”
I watched his shoulders slump tiredly as he walked back through the door. I wanted to wrap my arms around him and hold him until his stress melted away.
He did join me for at least one meal a day for the next three days, but I didn’t see him on day four until he sought me out as I was leaving for the club just to check in.
Over the course of those first few days, I found myself frequently wandering around the house lost in thought or staring at the papers on my desk while getting very little work completed. I was astounded by the level of loss I felt without his near constant presence. While I knew I’d developed romantic feelings for him during his time with me, I had either been unaware, or unable to accept, just how deeply ingrained in my life he’d become.
While I missed our play time of course, it was his strong, quiet presence that I felt somehow incomplete without. I discovered that I missed the way it felt to wake up and see him curled on the other side of the bed. During our nights together he always ended up sleeping in the same position. I’d wake to find him facing away from me on his belly. His nearest leg outstretched while the other bent up toward his hips, a pillow between his bent elbow and the side of his head, and the sheets somehow always tangled low around his waist. On such mornings, I’d taken to simply lying there after I woke, watching as his body moved with his breath and the way the color of his skin seemed to pale slightly as the light streaming in over the top of the closed drapes brightened with the rising sun.
I missed his smile across the table during meals and I found myself largely disinterested in eating without him there. He was always less formal with me while we ate and would often ramble endlessly about any number of topics. When he talked about work it was typically with equal parts irritation and enjoyment. While he’d been frustrated with his current contract for a long time, he clearly loved what he did. While I still didn’t know much about his friends or family, when he’d tell stories about his life before me, his college years, and on rare occasions even his childhood, his eyes lit up and we’d find ourselves laughing easily together.
It was difficult to face Sunday alone. While I always went to the club on Sunday nights, it wasn’t until late in the evening, and by early afternoon I found myself sitting on the couch wondering if he’d be upset if I joined him in his office simply to be around him. Throughout our months together, we’d discovered that we were both worn out by the time we got home on Saturday nights, and we’d taken to pushing Sunday breakfast back until it could almost be considered brunch. Most of the time we’d eat at home, but there had been a few Sundays where we’d headed out to enjoy the quiet, lazy, Sunday vibe in the city. We find some small bakery or café and take our time enjoying coffee and breakfast. Afterward we’d wander the nearby nature trails or find a bench to sit on in a park.
Whether we went out, or ate at home, we’d always end up back on the couch in the living room. Afternoon sunlight would stream in through the large picture windows with the tall trees out back casting dappled shadows across the dark hardwood floor. We’d put on a movie and curl up together, sometimes half napping, sometimes idly talking about nothing in particular.
When he chose the movies, they were usually science fiction, which had never been my genre of choice. He’d turned out to be quite the nerd, and the shocked look on his face whenever I’d tell him I’d not seen yet another of his favorites never got old. When we watched those, he was never silent; always lending extra information that had been left out of books if the movie was an adaptation or offering random facts about things that occurred during filming or character backstories.
I don’t think he realized that I’d noticed, but he’d regularly watch me from the corner of his eye when his favorite parts were coming up just to see if I liked them as well. More often than not, I found it hard to pry myself away from him to head to the club when evening arrived.
I struggled as I sat alone in the bright Sunday sunlight, trying my best to remind myself that my time with him would end in a couple of months anyway, and that I needed to remember he wasn’t really mine. It was simply the convenience of living with me during our contract that led him to spend his free time with me.
On day five he slumped into a chair across from me at lunch, unshaven, with bags under his eyes.
“You look… concerning. Are you alright?”
He ran his hands through his hair self-consciously. “I’m getting there. I only have three days left but I think I’m to a point where I’m going to make it on time.”
I simply nodded and we ate largely in silence. I was all too aware that making conversation would just use energy he clearly didn’t have, and we were comfortable enough with one another that silence was fine these days. Just being back in his presence for a short time was enough for me.
“Do you think you can spare another thirty minutes?” I asked hesitantly as we finished eating, I didn’t want him to feel pressured.
He cringed a bit but nodded.
I stood and offered my hand. “Come with me.”
I led him to our playroom and felt his hand tense as we entered, clearly he was concerned over what I was going to ask of him while he was in this state. I released his hand and quickly spread a clean sheet over the cushioned table we often used for sexual exploration.
“On your stomach please.”
He hesitated, a look of uncertainty on his face.
I chuckled softly. “You still don’t completely trust me, after all this time?”
He cringed and stripped quickly, making his way onto the table as he watched me from the corner of his eye.
“Do you know that I had a degree and a career before the club?” I asked as I retrieved the U-shaped support pillow that normally lived in the cabinet. As we’d only used the table for sex, I don’t think it had ever crossed his mind that it could double as massage table.
Surprise crossed his face. “No Sir”
I grinned as I crouched in front of him and connected the face support. “While it’s not a state secret or anything, let’s keep it between us huh?”
His face softened and he smiled tiredly as he shifted to rest his face on the pillow. “Yes Sir.”
“I was a physical therapist. A good one actually, and with that degree came a massage therapy license and a lot of experience.”
I stepped close, draped a large sheet professionally over him, and turned instrumental music quietly on in the background.
“Relax Beautiful.”
I rubbed eucalyptus oil into my hands and crouched back in front of him to place them below his face for a moment. “Breath for me.”
His breath deepened and slowed as I stood to begin with his shoulders.
“Do you only have 30 minutes, or do you think you can manage 60?” I asked as I dug gently into a knot behind his shoulder blade.
He hesitated. He wanted to stay but didn’t really have the time.
“45?” He spoke half questioningly.
“Sounds good Sweetheart.”
Fuck. Why had I let myself call him that. I’d settled on Beautiful early on when I’d realized I would certainly need some term of endearment for him, but always bit my tongue when I felt something more personal fight to slip out.
I worked his back and hips diligently, keeping him professionally draped throughout. This was purely to help relieve his stress, and I wanted him to know I had no other expectations. I had him flip to his back with 20 minutes remaining and worked his feet and calves before moving to the head of the table. Pulling a small stool over, I sat at the crown of his head as I gently teased the tension from his neck, jaw, face, and scalp.
I pressed my fingers into the back of his neck, lifting his head and taking its full weight in my hands. “Breath for me. Deep. Slow.”
He complied without thought and I found my breath matching his for five long breaths. I wanted more. I wanted to sit this close to him, to see him this peaceful, to hold him this intimately for longer. I knew I couldn’t. I lowered his head gently to the table as I kissed his forehead.
“Take all the time you need. I’ll be in my office the rest of the day and then at the club late tonight. If you need anything else, please don’t hesitate to let me or Jake know.”
As I walked past the table on my way out, his fingers caught my wrist, and I found his gaze. It was as open as I’d ever seen it. His jaw relaxed, his eyes almost glassy. “Thank you.”
There was no Sir. I didn’t correct him. “You’re more than welcome.”
I rushed out of the room and spent the rest of the day berating myself for crossing so many lines. I’d have happily offered such a service to any of my subs; to anyone in my employ really if they were as stressed as Alexander clearly was, but I’d called him sweetheart, kissed his forehead, and allowed him to thank me outside of our contracted dynamic without correcting him.
I didn’t see him at all for the next three days, but he sent several texts each day assuring me that he was still alive and that it was likely he was going to make his deadline, though just barely. I told myself that the space was good for me, that it would allow me to regain my perspective. I’d never been very good at lying to myself, and I didn’t believe a word of it.
When he missed breakfast and lunch on the fourth day, I found myself wondering if it would be inappropriate to knock on his office door just to check in. I didn’t. As I entered the dining room for dinner, he was waiting with a soft smile. While his under eyes were still darker than normal, and he looked exhausted, he was freshly shaven, and his blond waves were still damp from the shower.
“You finished?” I asked with a kind smile as I slid into my chair.
“I did.” He grinned. “They were thrilled with my work, have asked for very few revisions, and thank every god that exists I don’t ever have to animate hair again.”
I chuckled and stood, selecting a wine from the small wine fridge in the corner of the room and plucking two glasses from the rack that hung over it.
“Shall we celebrate?”
I rarely drink, and my subs are contractually obligated to refrain during our time together.
He smiled and held two fingers up with very little space between them as I uncorked the bottle. I poured myself half a glass before watching him closely as I slowly filled his. He nodded, indicating that I should stop when the glass was about a quarter full. His fingertips brushed mine as he took his glass from my hand.
I pretended that his touch after more than a week apart didn’t affect me and picked up my glass, holding it out toward his. He clinked them softly without a word and our eyes held as we both sipped.
To Jake’s benefit, he didn’t say a word as he walked in on the scene and laid dinner on the table. That man really needed a raise. I knew how it must have looked to walk in and find us drinking and toasting together.
I wanted nothing more than to take Alex to my room and spend the night making him moan for me, but I held myself in check. He had clearly slept all day and it would do him good to have an early night as well. It was a Wednesday, and I kept my distance the next day as well, joining him only for meals and placing no demands on him other than to instruct him to rest until Friday evening so that he could accompany me to the club over the weekend.
With only three weeks left before our second exhibition was scheduled, we fell back into our routine quickly. The brief glimpse of my life without him had left me realizing just how significant our time together was for me. I knew it would come to an end all too soon, but while he was here, while he was mine, I intended to enjoy every moment.
We were to be the second act of the evening, and as what we had planned would likely be hindered by nervous energy, not improved by it as our previous exhibition had been, we arrived at the club early in the evening and made our rounds as we always did. I chatted with regular patrons and employees while he followed; always close to me and largely silent.
We settled into a corner table when the first exhibition began, a slow, deliberate Shabari demonstration. It was something I’d always been intrigued and intimidated by, and I’d yet to learn enough to bring it into my own kink practice. It was beautiful to watch, and several times Alex leaned over to whisper, asking questions, and expressing how impressive he found it as well. I couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like to learn and explore together if I had more time with him.
By the time we made our way to the stage more than an hour later, we were both relaxed and enjoying the relatively calm and sensual evening we’d had so far. I led us onto the platform as Jeymes announced us and turned the platform’s rotation feature back on. It completed one full rotation every five minutes, not fast enough that the performers could feel the movement and be distracted, but enough that those in the crowd could get a 360-degree view of what was occurring. Something that was important in this instance.
I stepped in front of Alex without a word and removed his chest harness as his eyes held mine. His gaze followed as I dropped to my knees and slowly removed his leather pants. He sprang free, already half hard. I stood, still facing him and slowly removed my vest. I knew he enjoyed watching me, and by the time I dropped it to the floor he had hardened completely, resting upward, nearly against his belly. I turned to face the crowd.
“We request your silence.” I spoke in a deep, quite tone that brooked no argument and the hushed murmur of the crowd quickly faded.
I turned back and offered Alex a sensual smile as I unzipped my pants. His eyes grew wide in surprise and a single drop fell from his cock to the floor as he watched me sink down and cast them to the side. There was a brief murmur from the crowd. Seeing me naked was something no one expected.
I gestured to the table with my chin, and he tore his gaze from me to climb up onto his back. I followed quickly, climbing over him and settling in with my knees straddling his lower ribs, leaving his cock visible to the crowd behind my ass. I shifted my weight down onto my forearms beside his head, keeping my ass elevated so that my hard length barely brushed against his chest. It was unavoidable. I was long enough I’d have to rest on my hands rather than my forearms to avoid touching him completely and I needed to be close enough to whisper to him. I knew that I was offering an extremely intimate view of myself to the crowd; something that was likely shocking from the club’s owner, but it mattered less to me than our ability to do this together.
I let my gaze find his with a soft smile. “Grab the edge of the table.”
I felt his arms shift under me.
“Keep them there.”
“Yes Sir.”
“You ready Beautiful?”
He nodded softly.
“Moan for me. Quietly. Just for me. Let me hear how ready you are.”
His body trembled under me as a soft moan escaped his throat.
I dropped my head down so that my lips rest just against his ear. “Mmmm that’s it. Just like that. Let me hear how much you want me again.”
He was always extremely vocal when I allowed him the choice and I knew that encouraging him to let go with me in this moment would help him.
Another whimper and shiver ran through his body.
“I know what it is you want. You want to feel my lips brush against your neck and jaw while my hands explore your ribs. Your back. Your stomach. You want my tongue to trace along the curve of your throat. For me to take your nipple between my teeth, nearly hard enough to draw blood while I flick my tongue across it inside the warmth of my mouth.
His back arched as he whimpered.
“You want to look down and watch as I explore your chest, nipping at your beautiful skin as I make my way lower. For me to slide my jaw along the side of your silken length and press the tip of my tongue into your slit to taste you.”
I shifted my head slightly, allowing my breath to travel along his jaw and ear instead of the bend of his neck. “For me to sink to my knees in front of you, taking you deep down my throat, bringing you to the edge before moving away to pick up my whip.”
Our bodies were so close that I felt every subtle movement he made. The way his back arched up and his arms tensed as he fought to keep his hands gripping the sides of the table. The way he squirmed and writhed at my words and the way my body was close enough that it radiated heat against his even though he couldn’t touch me.
“You want me to circle around you as you stand waiting. To feel my fingertips trailing gently up along your spine, getting you ready for me. You want me to walk to the table and pick up the small vibrator, the one that finds just the right spot inside of you.”
His back arched hard under me and a loud moan fell from his lips. Good.
“That’s right. You want to feel me slide it into you, slowly at first before thrusting hard for a moment.”
He arched yet again.
“For my whip to come down hard across your back and chest, and softly against your cock as you leak for me Beautiful.”
He whimpered continuously. The muscles of his neck and jaw tensing and straining against my lips.
I whispered to him for what felt like hours. Reveling in the light patina of sweat that appeared on the skin of his neck and forehead as his body strained for the release it craved. Basking in the soft whimpers that escaped him, and the way his back instinctively arched as if reaching toward a lover’s embrace even though he knew I wouldn’t touch him.
His breath came hard and fast as he panted underneath me.
“Are you ready to cum with me Beautiful?”
I raised my head from the bend of his neck to find his eyes. His amazement was easily visible to me even through the lust they wore. He had certainly never expected me to join him.
He nodded emphatically and bit his lip. I smiled and held his gaze.
“I’m so close.”
A tremor ran through him.
“So close from simply feeling the heat from your skin and the look in your eyes.”
I felt his body roll under me once more.
I held his gaze as I spoke. “I haven’t been inside of you nearly enough in our time together.”
Another quiet whimper escaped him.
“I want to slide back right here right now. I’m so close to you. It would be so easy. I want to tell you to let go of the table. To feel your knees clutch at my hips as your fingers dig into my shoulders. To thrust into you deep and hard, again and again until your head falls back in pleasure.”
His shivering was constant now. I knew he was finally at the point of having to hold himself back.
“Cum with me beautiful. Three more hard, fast thrusts into you.”
He whimpered and nodded.
“One.”
“Two.”
“Thr….”
He cried out and his head fell back as I felt a wet heat splash against the back of my thighs and ass. I let go of the world. Nothing existed outside of the silver blue of his eyes, barely visible under hooded lids. The heat radiating from his skin, so close to my own. The feel of his cum slowly cooling on my legs and ass. I dropped my head into the bend of his neck and joined him with a deep shuddering whimper as my own release washed over me.
When I raised my head, his eyes were searching for mine; a soft, contented smile on his face. I held his gaze for a long moment before the roaring applause made its way into my consciousness.
I leaned in to brush my lips across his jaw. “You are spectacular.”
I slipped off of him to stand beside the table and he followed quickly. I took his wrist, offering a slight bow and grin to the crowd before leading him off the stage. I winked at Jeyems, passing her as she stood just to the side of the platform, clapping but obviously shocked. As we entered the small recovery room, I heard her address the crowd.
“Well, that folks was certainly one for the books. Not only did we get to see our dungeon master at work in all of his glory, we got to experience a rare hands free moment from both of our performers.”
I grinned and took Alex’s face in both hands, pressing his body back against the door as I covered his mouth with mine completely. Possessing him completely. His fingertips tentatively trailed along my hips as his tongue met mine with abandon.
When I finally pulled away, he was panting and grinning.
“Check?”
“Is there a better than green?”
I laughed. “No.”
“Then green.” He grinned. “It turns out I might be quite the exhibitionist and that was…”
He trailed off searching for words.
I ended his search by brushing my lips across his briefly once more. “It was indeed.”
He knelt without prompting in the middle of the room’s soft rug as I’d instructed him to do after our first exhibition as I gathered warm damp towels and returned to clean him gently. I was always careful to care for his needs before my own.
I recovered our clothes from just outside the door where Jeymes had placed them and took my time getting us ready to head back out. We were both enjoying the night immensely and we stayed until the club closed at two am.
When we arrived home, we found ourselves still in a state of relaxed euphoria and we showered leisurely together. He hardened quickly as my hands slid across his slick skin, washing away the sweat and smell of the club, but I found myself ignoring it. Somehow, I didn’t want more sex with him, I wanted to stay lost in whatever spell had fallen over us together on that stage. I dried him tenderly before I dried myself and took him by the hand without a word, leading him to my bed and crawling in behind him to pull him tightly into my arms.
Our Sunday passed as they always did, with a late breakfast and lazy afternoon curled up on the couch together. It was nearly 9pm when I forced myself to say goodnight to make my way to change and head back to work.
Jake, already expecting me to be at the club, stepped in to gather the laundry while I was changing.
“You’re home late today.”
I laughed lightly. “I know. I’m a bit tired this evening and truthfully only half want to go.”
His eyes laughed mischievously. “Enjoyed the exhibition a little too much huh?”
“You know exhibitionism isn’t really my thing.”
He leaned against the door jam as his smile softened. “No. But something else is certainly your thing, isn’t it?”
I glanced up as I laced up my first boot. “What do you mean?”
He didn’t speak until I’d finished and looked back up to catch his gaze.
“You know you’re in love with him, right?”
Fuck.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
Of course, I knew I was in love with him. I’d just been avoiding it.
I rolled my eyes and pulled on my second boot. “I’m no such thing.”
“Grey.”
He stood silent until I laced it and looked up once more. “You’re in love with him.”
Jake had been my assistant for six years. And while we’d never had the type of relationship that led us to spend our free time together, he was the closest thing I really had to a friend.
I felt my brows furrow as I pulled on my jacket and started toward the door.
I stopped closer than I typically stood to him and searched his eyes for a long moment.
A harsh whisper was the best I could manage. “Don’t tell him ok.”
The smile he forced across his face for a moment as I brushed past him and out the door somehow seemed more sad than anything.