A gay story: Secret Prayer Ch. 03 Jarek finished his set and left the stage, grabbing a towel from the staff member waiting to gather the loose bills from the stage floor. He had one more trip to the stage before he was done for the night and it was hard for him to keep his head in the game. He had had several requests for private dances tonight and he had only managed to make it through them by imagining he was dancing for Gage.
He had heard of dancers getting stuck on customers before and quitting the job, and he could probably afford to finish up his last four semesters for his degree with what he had saved up, but then came the residency. He shook his head to clear it and finished toweling off backstage.
Two weeks after the hospitalization, Gage got his stitches out and was cleared to start getting into his physical therapy, so a few times a week, they would head over to meet with Jarek to work on the exercises he wanted to run Gage through. Jarek would plan it out each day as to how they would start, usually with some type of warmup like walking or the bike, and then moving onto exercises based on how the knee was feeling.
It was less swollen than it was before, and the wound looked far better. It was clear it was going to scar but Gage mentioned that he had so many scars from dirt biking and hockey that one more wasn’t a big deal.
They spent most of the time they were working together, and some time afterward, talking about anything and everything. Gage kept to his promise to talk about the LDS religion, but he was very candid with it and with his own experiences in the church. He had some funny church stories that he was happy to tell, like how his dad had knocked his older sister’s head against the side of the baptism pool in front of all of their family and the ward when she was baptized at eight, and when his younger sister tried to eat all of the sacrament bread one time.
Gage preferred it though when Jarek did the talking. Gage liked learning about him and his life, even the difficult parts. The more time they spent together, the more Gage couldn’t deny to himself that he was falling for Jarek. They hadn’t been romantic with each other, and hadn’t kissed or anything. The only time they really touched were comforting gestures or ones to show him the correct stance or posture for the exercises, but every single touch felt electric and exciting and Gage was always on edge waiting for the next time Jarek would get to touch him. He wanted Jarek to touch him more and more.
While he was working on rehabbing his knee after the injury, on Mondays, which happened to be their preparation day for their mission, Gage would call home. The phone calls were becoming more tense though. He could tell that something was going on at home, but no one would really tell him what it was.
“You need to be focused on your mission, dear,” his mother would tell him sweetly.
“Your mission is your first priority,” his dad reminded him.
“Craig’s just being a big baby,” Kayla, his older sister, said at one point.
“What do you mean, a baby?” he asked, looking over at where Tate was, who raised an eyebrow at him.
“It’s nothing,” Craig yelled before he hung up the phone on Gage.
“That doesn’t sound good,” Tate said while Gage sat there staring at his phone.
“I’ll have to call Addison once she’s home from school,” Gage replied, chewing on his bottom lip anxiously.
When he did eventually get his younger sister on the phone, Addison explained that Craig had snuck away to be with his boyfriend and their dad followed him there. There was a huge fight and it had turned physical. When Craig was dragged back home, his keys were taken away, as was his phone, and he had mostly barricaded himself up in his room for days.
“Dad and Craig get into screaming fights every night,” Addison told him. “Dad keeps trying to bring him back right with god, and you know how well Craig takes that. So they scream at each other for a few hours, and then Craig locks the door and won’t answer anymore. I don’t know how to help him.”
“I can try to talk to him,” Gage replied. “Do you think maybe Craig needs to just…leave?”
“Maybe,” Addison allowed, though she said it hesitantly. “I don’t think he’d leave without his car though.”
“Thanks, Addi,” Gage replied before they hung up the phone. He didn’t have any more time for phone calls, so he decided he would call on Sunday to talk to Craig.
They saw Jarek after walking around through the day on Tuesday, after his classes but before his night job. Gage’s brother was still on his mind, so he didn’t greet Jarek with his normal enthusiasm. Jarek waved but wasn’t sure whether or not to intrude on Gage’s thoughts when he didn’t really respond. He looked to Tate for a hint as to what to do.
“Major family drama,” Tate whispered to Jarek before he nudged Gage by pushing on his shoulder.
That seemed to break Gage out of his thoughts. “Sorry. My brother is dealing with some stuff and I’ve been thinking of what I want to say to him when I call him later this week.”
Jarek nodded. “I know you’re not encouraged to do such things, but if you need to contact your brother during our visits…”
Gage smiled at Jarek warmly. “I really appreciate that, and I might take you up on it once I figure out what might best help him. You know, you’re pretty good at this physical therapy thing. My knee already feels a lot stronger.”
Jarek smiled at the compliment, deciding that he would order dinner in for their next therapy session. “What do you like to eat, Gage?”
“I tend to be a meat and potatoes kind of guy,” Gage replied. “But I like things like Indian and Chinese food too.”
Jarek smiled and nodded, making a mental note. Tate went outside to smoke and read a book while Jarek started Gage on his warm ups. Gage put aside the upheaval he knew was happening back at home to focus on Jarek and the exercises. It was easy to forget about everything but Jarek when they spent time together, and soon Gage seemed like himself again as they worked on strengthening his knee and talking to each other.
By the end, the hardest thing for Gage was not being able to just kiss Jarek. Despite them both admitting they liked each other at the hospital, their relationship hadn’t progressed much past the occasional flirty statement, and lingering touches sometimes. It was clear they were both attracted to each other, and wanted to explore that, but both were trying to figure out how to do that under their current circumstances.
Gage waited to call his brother until Jarek was ordering food on that Thursday. He didn’t have work after classes so they could sit and eat together. Gage let Tate and Jarek look through the options and order the food while he called Craig.
“Gage?” Craig answered the phone. “Aren’t you supposed to not call on your work days?”
“Usually, yeah, but I’m worried about you,” Gage commented, which earned a sigh from his brother. “Is the family there?”
Gage could hear his brother move and lift up the blinds in his room. “No, Danielle is having her birthday party today, so they all went over to Uncle Henry’s house. Dad took my car so I can’t go anywhere, and he has cameras set up around all of the exits to the house now so he’ll know if I try to leave.”
Gage almost didn’t know what to say for a moment. “That’s insane. Like, out of his mind, controlling.”
“I know,” Craig sighed. “I don’t have a way to make them listen though. They’re so set on the fact that I’m walking down an ungodly path if I stay with Rick.”
“You know you aren’t alone, right?” Gage asked his brother.
“How am I not?” Craig demanded.
“Because I’m gay, and I’m positive I’m falling in love with a man I met out here,” Gage answered, looking over at where Jarek was telling Tate how long it would take the food to get there. They couldn’t hear what Gage was saying right then, as he was closer to the kitchen now, but he and Jarek locked eyes for a moment and Jarek had the feeling Gage was talking about him.
Jarek smiled a genuine smile at Gage and winked playfully but it was too close to reading his thoughts for Gage, who blushed in response. Jarek turned back to his conversation with Tate before their eye contact reached the awkward stage.
“How did you manage to do that while busy with your mission?” Craig asked after a moment of silence while he digested that information.
“I got injured, and he’s helping me with physical therapy while we talk,” Gage responded casually.
“Injured how?” Craig cried, and Gage told him the whole story of the bike accident and the hospital visit. Craig didn’t seem particularly surprised that the Mission President hadn’t taken the injury that seriously, but he kept those thoughts to himself. “Well, I’m glad you’re okay and getting help with the knee. You can’t tell mom and dad about this guy though. Or Kayla.”
“I know,” Gage replied. “I just wanted you to know. You aren’t doing all of this alone.”
“I would never wish this on you, though, Gage,” Craig lamented. “And you don’t even have the chance of falling for a woman if you’re gay. They would be so much worse on you than they are me, and this already feels like torture.”
“How can I help you?” Gage asked him, pacing the room so he was closer to Tate and Jarek.
“From where you are? I have no idea,” Craig admitted. “If I think of anything, I’ll text you. Hey, dad just pulled up to the house. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
“Okay,” Gage said, fear evident in his voice, which caught the attention of Tate and Jarek. “I love you, Craig.”
“I love you too,” Craig replied and then the phone beeped that the call was over.
Jarek looked concerned. “Is he okay? Are you going to be okay?”
Gage shook his head, his expression that of someone who was really lost right then. He kept staring down at his phone, the screen black now from inactivity. “I don’t know, to be honest, on either count. He said dad was home again, but I can’t imagine them being at the house together is a good idea right now. I don’t have a way to help him though.”
Jarek touched his shoulder comfortingly. “I’m sorry. Is there anything I can do for you?” he asked.
Gage turned his eyes over to Jarek, taking in the genuine concern on his face as he watched Gage. He put his hand over Jarek’s and gave him as warm of a smile as he could. “Honestly, you being here is helping a lot. You help make me feel like I’m not alone right now.”
“Well, don’t tell Tate, he might get jealous,” Jarek said with a wink.
“We wouldn’t want that,” Gage replied with a light smile.
“Yeah, Gage wants you all to himself,” Tate joked.
“Oh really?” Jarek said, arching his eyebrow. He couldn’t help but wonder if his recent dry spell was because he had a newfound distaste for hookups and shallow sex. Most of all he wondered if it was all tied to his burgeoning feelings for this lost Mormon boy. Gage blushed in response to Jarek’s attention on him, but he didn’t dispute what Tate had said.
Jarek looked away, a slight blush coloring his cheeks. “It’s not like it’s entirely one-sided,” Jarek mumbled.
Gage heard what he mumbled and looked over at Jarek with only a small amount of surprise. He couldn’t help but smile to himself at that. It gave him some hope, that he still hadn’t decided what he was going to do with it. He had been sitting with his feelings for a bit, trying to decide whether he wanted to finish his mission, and even if he did or didn’t, whether he would find a way to stay here to be with Jarek and start his life finally.
The three of them had a wonderful dinner once it was delivered, with Jarek and Gage sitting closer together at the table than was necessary. Tate smiled at them but didn’t say anything. This was one companion he actually wanted to see end up happy after he was away from their mission.
Gage was still considering all of his options a few weeks later when he got a text from his brother. It simply said, “Don’t make any decisions or changes until you get my letter.”
Gage stared at the phone for a moment, trying to figure out why this was making his stomach sink. Then he replied, “Alright, I promise I won’t. Is everything okay? You’re worrying me.”
“No, it’s not okay, but it will be. I promise. I love you, okay?” Craig sent back.
“Do you wanna talk? I can take some time for a phone call right now,” Gage said, but the text went unanswered.
It was only a few days later that Gage was asked to come in and see the Mission President alone. Tate waited back at the apartment while Gage went to see him. He came into Mr. Hartman’s office where the man was standing with a grim look on his face. He motioned for Gage to sit down in the chair across from him, and once they were both seated, Mr. Hartman started to rip apart Gage’s entire life.
“I got a call from your father,” Mr. Hartman said, putting his elbows on the table and steepling his fingers in front of him. “Your brother’s body was found in the forest behind your house. It looks like he took one of your father’s guns and shot himself. Your parents are planning a closed casket ceremony for your brother, and we can send you home for that. We could also just send you home early. Your parents felt, though, that you should stay and finish your mission. They said it’s what your brother would have wanted you to do.”
Gage let out a breathy laugh at that, mostly in shock. He could picture his parents doing that, but he didn’t think Craig would have told him to do so. He was about to tell Mr. Hartman to send him home, but then Craig’s last texts came to mind and he wondered if this was why Craig had told him that. His mind flashed with Jarek’s face too, so he paused and considered that before nodding slowly.
“I think my parents are right,” Gage said quietly. “My mission is important. I’ll pay my respects to my brother later.”
Mr. Hartman gave a nod. “Very good. I’ll let you get back to your companion then. If you need to call or text your family, go ahead and take some time to.”
Gage came back to the apartment and sat down on the bed. Tate looked up at Gage’s face and furrowed his eyebrows. “What did Hartman want?”
“My brother killed himself,” Gage replied.
“Holy shit, are you serious?” Tate exclaimed. It was the first time Gage had ever heard him swear.
“Yeah, because this is such a fun thing to joke about and seems right up my alley,” Gage replied, the sarcasm thick in his voice.
“Whoa, one I didn’t mean it that way, and two I didn’t even know you could be sarcastic!” Tate cried. “Wait, they had the Mission President tell you and not your family? What the hell?”
Gage shook his head and shrugged. “I guess they’re too busy dealing with everything. I don’t know.”
“Are you okay?” Tate asked him, and Gage shook his head. Tate moved over to Gage’s bed and pulled him into a hug, where Gage broke down sobbing. He couldn’t deal with the idea that he would never see or talk to his older brother ever again.
The next few times Jarek saw them, Gage was aware and present, but it was clear something was very wrong. Gage was pale and out of it, making mistakes, and he turned down any offers for food or drink. Tate gave Jarek a worried shake of his head when Jarek looked to him for help.
Gage was like a ghost for two weeks, just going through the motions and losing weight while trying to keep up with his duties, before he received the letter from Craig. Gage had been expecting it to come in the mail, which was silly because the Mission President would have been sure to read it before he gave it to Gage, and Craig would have known that.
Instead, Gage ended up face to face with Rick, Craig’s boyfriend, who looked just as out of it and upset as Gage did. He waited until Tate and Gage had taken a break in the middle of the day in a shaded part of a park to approach them and introduce himself. He apologized for it taking so long, but he had wanted to go to Craig’s funeral and he’d been having a hard time dealing with his suicide.
Gage and Rick ended up talking for a long time about Craig and what happened. At the end of the talk, Rick handed Gage an envelope and hugged him before saying he hoped he heard from him going forward. They exchanged numbers and then Rick went back to his hotel while Gage and Tate went back to their apartment.
The two of them sat down and ate dinner first, and then Gage sat down and tore into the letter while Tate went to go get a shower to get ready for bed.
“Dear Gage,
I know this letter won’t find you well, and I’m sorry for that, but I can’t do this anymore. I can’t face a life without any of my family in it, and most importantly, I can’t face a life without Rick. Our parents have put me at an impasse where no matter what direction I go in, it’s the wrong one.
I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said about that guy out there you’re falling for. I’m hoping this reaches you before you go home. If you really love this man, then don’t question it, and don’t give our family a chance to stop you. Once you’re back home, they’ll do whatever they can to stop you from doing anything other than going to BYU and getting a good job.
Do better than I did. You have an opportunity to get away from them now and live how you want. Take it.
I love you, and I’m sorry,
Craig.”
Gage sat on the bed for a little bit, thinking over what he had read, and rereading it a few times. Finally, he took off his name tag and dropped it on the bed. He took off his tie and unbuttoned his white dress shirt before he got up and grabbed his empty suitcase. He filled it up with his pajamas and workout clothes, the only non-uniformed outfits he had. Tate came into the room while he was packing and stopped in the doorway.
“Are you going home?” Tate asked him.
Gage shook his head and put the letter into the smaller pocket of his suitcase. “No. I’m abandoning the mission and staying here in Chicago. I’ll look into resources once I’m gone, but I’ll have my phone. I think I’d rather stay here, leave the church, and see what could be blossoming between me and Jarek, you know?”
“I’ll miss having you as a companion,” Tate told him. “All the other ones sucked.”
Gage smiled at that. “If you ever run away and want to join my circus, you’re welcome with me. The church isn’t the ultimate decision on what a good person is. I’m proud to consider you my friend.”
Tate hugged Gage tightly. “Nah, my brother. We’re brothers now, okay?”
Gage told Tate where he could find him if he wanted to visit before he got a new companion, and then took off toward Jarek’s house. It was getting later into the night. When he got there, the house looked dark other than the light shining on the porch. Gage paced along the porch for a moment when no one answered before he slipped around through the gate on the side. He hid his suitcase in the backyard under one of the lawn chairs and then headed in the direction of Jarek’s night job.
Gage knew where he worked now, as it had come up before, though he had never actually gone there. He had made sure he had his phone and wallet with him. When he got there, he had to pay the cover charge and then have his hand stamped to show he wasn’t allowed to buy any alcohol before he was let inside. It was partially dark inside and the lights were centered on the stage. Gage looked around, trying to figure out where Jarek could be right then. He wasn’t sure he wanted to see him giving a lap dance, but he’d deal with it if he did.
Just then the DJ started talking up the next performer, “Everyone welcome the Horseman to the stage! He doesn’t really need an introduction but I see a few new faces in the crowd tonight. Just a reminder of the rules…” she continued but her voice sort of faded into the background for Gage as he saw Jarek come out from backstage wearing leather chaps and a motorcycle vest and a skullcap helmet. His outfit was complete with square-toed boots and aviator sunglasses.
The music started up, a classic rock song by Steppenwolf called “Born to be Wild.” Gage knew this song, of course, but it felt like hearing it for the first time as he watched Jarek start his routine. Gage sat down not too far from the stage, watching as Jarek moved around and lost parts of his costume as he went.
There had been quite a few times that Gage had seen Jarek half naked now, usually just in shorts after a shower, but this was entirely new. There had been so many times he had thought about kissing Jarek, or feeling their bodies pressed together, but right then was the first time that Gage ever seriously considered what else he might want to do with Jarek, and none of it was family friendly.
He had, of course, considered to himself whether gay sex was something he could handle. He’d done his own research before his mission ever came up, so he knew what it entailed. Watching as Jarek stripped down to a g-string though, he never felt so sure of himself in his life that he was willing to do whatever he needed to.
Jarek finished his set dramatically, but a little mechanically. He clearly enjoyed the dancing but he wasn’t connecting with the clientele the way he used to. He couldn’t even remember the last time he had singled out a patron to take home for a little romp. He left the stage and went backstage to change without even looking around the club or working over the crowd to see who wanted a private dance. Once backstage, he toweled off and changed into something less revealing to begin making his circuit to offer private dances between sets. The club owner had decided years ago to use the gray sweatpants trope to good effect for this task. Jarek changed his g-string and put on his “uniform” of gray sweatpants before leaving the dressing area.
Gage was still deep in thought when Jarek came out to make his way around the crowd. The DJ announced another dancer for the stage and Gage looked over at where Jarek was talking to a small party of people. Gage wasn’t sure what he was going to say to Jarek when he noticed him, other than that he was done trying to be who he just couldn’t be anymore. He stood up and moved closer to Jarek while he considered the options.
Jarek’s mind registered that someone was approaching him but because he never would have expected Gage in this environment, he didn’t register who it was until Gage was right behind him on his left side. Jarek turned and stared at him slack-jawed while his brain pieced together who he was, then cycled through a quick set of reactionary measures like covering his exposed chest, then posing a little to show off his physique to the best possible effect.
Gage couldn’t help but chuckle at him, taking the time to appreciate the physique that Jarek was displaying for him. Jarek noticed that Gage didn’t look the way he normally did. His blonde hair was out of its normal style, which was usually slicked to the side but now it was a little messy and spiked up. His white dress shirt was untucked and open, showing the white tank top underneath and the peak of skin of his chest. He’d ditched the tie entirely and had his hands in his pockets.
“Hey,” Gage finally said. “I went to your place, but you weren’t there and figured that left your work as the only other place you might be right now.”
“Yes! I had to revamp my schedule to make sure I was available for your rehab and had enough time to study but that’s okay. I would have needed to change it up anyway,” Jarek blurted. “Um, can I interest you in a private dance?”
Gage looked Jarek over again, taking in the way he looked in those gray sweatpants and bare chested. He’d never been in a strip club before, so he’d never had a private dance either. He had cash on him, though it was supposed to be for emergencies. It was Jarek though, and Gage couldn’t seem to stop himself from nodding in response to the question.
Jarek took his hand and led him to a private room off of the main seating near the DJ. He whispered something to the DJ and she nodded, eyeing Gage as Jarek motioned for him to enter first. Gage walked into the room first, looking around at the seating in it for a moment before he sat down and looked at Jarek. Jarek could tell he was nervous but trying hard to keep the nervous energy inside.
Jarek explained that the DJ couldn’t start their song until the stage dance finished, so Gage was getting a bit of free time. He said this while stripping his gray sweatpants off to reveal a cowhide g-string. He explained the club rules to Gage in a practiced, patient cadence. Stage dances and other interactions out in the public areas were hands-off and strictly enforced by the bouncers. Back here, things were a bit more relaxed, and generally controlled by the dancer.
“So, this is where you get to have fun if you want to then?” Gage asked.
“Yeah, I used to,” Jarek said, blushing. “I haven’t in a little while, though.” He started dancing over Gage’s lap; gentle and slow gyrations designed to help Gage get used to being danced on.
“Why did you stop?” Gage asked, his breath up against Jarek’s ear as he spoke.
Jarek turned around, twerking against Gage’s chest as he answered. “I… um… met someone who changed my mind about hookups.”
Gage let his eyes follow the lines of Jarek’s muscles down his back and to his ass as he took that in. He couldn’t help but smile at the answer. He hesitantly ran his hand down Jarek’s back, stopping before he went down too far. “I think I know a little of what you mean. I left my mission.”
“Does that mean you’re not a missionary anymore?” Jarek asked, turning around so fast with Gage’s hand on the small of his back that it ended up still touching Jarek’s lightly oiled skin near his belly button, Jarek’s package directly in front of Gage’s face.
“Yeah, though I expect they’ll try to talk me out of it if they can find me,” Gage replied, letting himself look at Jarek’s barely clothed package before looking back up at Jarek’s face.
Jarek smirked. “So what are you now? Doggy style?” He accentuated this with a slight humping movement, undulating his torso sexily.
Gage laughed. “I don’t know. I guess I’ll have to test all of them out to find out.”
Jarek laughed at that and hooked his thumbs in the waist of the g-string, pulling it out a little at the top as if offering Gage a peek, but letting it fall closed again just before Gage could see much of anything. Gage jokingly called him a tease as he ran his hand up Jarek’s chest, his fingertips lightly brushing over one of Jarek’s nipples.
“I was thinking I would stay in Chicago if I could find some place to stay and a way to make money,” Gage told him.
“I have a spare bedroom if you’d like, though the bed in there isn’t as comfortable as the one in the master bedroom,” Jarek said, dropping down to a hard sit on Gage’s lap as the current song ended.
Jarek could feel that his dance definitely had an effect on Gage, who kept his hand on the shoulder he had stopped at previously. “Well, that is good, because I didn’t really know who else to go to for help, honestly. Plus, while I get my bearings and look for help for myself getting on my feet, my brother gave me some advice to follow my heart, and…well, we’ve admitted we like each other, but haven’t done anything about it yet.”
“Just so long as you follow your heart and not…” Jarek said, grinding hard on Gage’s stiff cock.
Gage let out a little groan at that and then laughed. “I mean, I wasn’t following that, but if you keep that up, I might.”
Jarek smiled a wicked grin and did just that, grinding on Gage’s lap until he could tell that the poor man was at his limit. Gage swore under his breath; it was the first time Jarek had ever heard him swear in the time he had known Gage, and Gage put his forehead on Jarek’s shoulder. As he lifted his head, with the plan to look at Jarek again, he moved forward and licked a bead of sweat off of Jarek’s neck instead before lightly biting on the skin there. He could feel Jarek’s cock swell in response immediately as Jarek moaned breathily into Gage’s ear.
Gage had a smirk on his face when he sat back again. “Two can play that game, Horseman.”
Jarek smiled wickedly and stepped up the pace on Gage’s lap before standing slowly, dragging the front of his g-string along Gage’s belly and chest. Gage had been serious about playing this game right back, allowing his mouth to follow along the skin as Jarek moved, starting with his neck and then down his chest and stomach. There was the light flavor of salt from sweat and the oil, but it wasn’t bad at all. Jarek stopped just shy of shoving his bulge in Gage’s mouth and pulled away, tousling Gage’s hair and pretending to hump his face as the new song started.
Gage chuckled at that and ran both hands along Jarek’s sides. He could see why Jarek was so popular and did so well in this job. He was confident and sexy, and completely unafraid of looking silly. It was a big reason why Gage was so attracted to him, but at this point it went far deeper than that because he had seen how focused he was on his schooling, and how caring and compassionate he could be too.
“You really are the whole package,” Gage murmured, not realizing he said his thoughts out loud.
“Yes, you may touch my package,” Jarek said, pretending to have misheard him.
Gage gave him a smirk and brought his left hand down to feel exactly why Jarek got the name Horseman. His eyes widened a little as he looked up at Jarek, and Jarek could practically see the man calculating fitting that somewhere. Jarek smiled and nodded knowingly. Most people found his size impressive, though it was often not something he thought about much.
Jarek was the first man Gage had ever touched like this, having tried hard to ignore this side of himself for years. He marveled a little at how responsive Jarek was to his touch, and that helped him feel a little more confident in what he was doing.
“When do you work until tonight?” Gage asked him.
“The next stage dance is my last one,” Jarek responded, putting his hands behind his head and swiveling his hips dramatically.
“I’ll wait for you then,” Gage replied as he ran his right hand along Jarek’s near perfect ass. He leaned forward and licked up another bead of sweat off of Jarek’s abs, his tongue dipping down into his belly button for a moment as he followed sweat down to the top of the g-string.
Jarek hooked his thumbs into the front of the g-string and flipped it, allowing his hardening cock to drop out in front of Gage’s hungry eyes. Gage let out a small gasp as he took in the sight. Gage ran his fingers along the length of Jarek, taking a little bit of the precum on his fingers before stroking back down, getting Jarek up to full hardness.
“Fuck, you’re so hot,” Gage murmured.
Jarek nodded in agreement and held still. This part had to be Gage’s choice. The music played on, nearing the middle of the song. Gage looked up at Jarek’s face, wanting to see his expressions, as he leaned forward and licked up the shaft, dipping his tongue into the slit to taste the precum there. It was a little salty, but didn’t taste like much of anything else. It was his first sexual contact with a man, but it was more thrilling and sexy than any time he had messed around with a woman. He was so hard it practically hurt.
Gage took the head into his mouth and slowly went down as far as he could until he gagged and had to come back up. Jarek moaned quietly and smiled at the sight of himself disappearing into Gage’s mouth. “We have to put your new toy away when the song is over, but there’s much more to come when we get home,” Jarek said softly.
Gage would have smiled if his mouth wasn’t full, but he nodded his understanding and went back to moving up and down on Jarek’s cock, deciding to make the most of the minute or so they had left on the song. Jarek’s cock twitched as Gage worked it over, and he twined his fingers in the man’s golden hair. He kept up a quiet but steady stream of compliments and appreciative words.
Gage went down Jarek’s length again, working on breathing through his nose to get past his gag reflex and opened his throat a bit to take more in. He swallowed when he felt Jarek hitting the back of his throat, something he had seen someone mention doing on a forum somewhere. Jarek let out a surprised gasp and felt his balls tighten up in anticipation of his impending release. “I’m going to cum if you keep doing that,” he warned Gage thoughtfully.
Gage would have smirked at that, and his eyes twinkled mischievously up at Jarek before he did it again. Jarek nodded his understanding of Gage’s challenge and felt his balls tighten again in response to the virgin’s ministrations. Jarek threw his head back and moaned softly as his cock erupted, spurting the contents of his balls down Gage’s open throat. Gage kept up with swallowing, taking down everything that Jarek gave to him.
Jarek backed his deflating cock gently out of Gage’s wondrous mouth just in time to flip it back into his g-string and plop himself down on Gage’s lap, kissing him deeply as the final verse of the song played. Gage kissed him back, slipping his arms around Jarek possessively. Jarek stayed engaged in the kiss for as long as he dared as the song faded out and a new song faded in.
He pulled back reluctantly and said, “I’ve got to go get ready for my last stage dance, but you can take your time getting situated. Don’t worry about paying the bouncer for the dance, I usually hand him the client’s money on my way out anyway.” Jarek then booped Gage’s nose and stood up fluidly, dressing quickly and pulling a twenty dollar bill from the pocket of his sweatpants as he disappeared through the heavy curtain that served as a door.
Gage took a little bit to calm himself down, thinking Book of Mormon verses to himself just so he could walk out of the private room without a hard on. Once he was ready, he stood up and straightened his clothing before walking out. He went up to the bartender to ask for a glass of root beer and sat down to wait for Jarek. There was one person on the stage again before Jarek. They did a great stage performance but it was nowhere near as sexy as Jarek’s was to Gage.
“And now, coming to the main stage for his final dance of the evening, put your hands together for the Horseman! Giddy up!” announced the DJ, starting Jarek’s final song for the night.
Jarek mounted the stage wearing leather chaps and vest over the cowhide g-string Gage had seen in his private dance. His look was capped off with boots and a cowboy hat. Jarek made a tour of the edge of the stage, enticing the patrons seated there before taking a playful swing around the pole in the center of the stage.
Gage smiled as he watched Jarek. He had never thought he could date someone who worked at a strip club like this, but Jarek looked so free and like he was having a blast on stage, and all it did was make Gage want to see him look like that all the time. Free and happy. He was realizing as he sat there that he had fallen for Jarek pretty hard, and it was making him realize that his priorities and morals didn’t lie where the church’s and his family’s did, and he wasn’t mad about it.
Jarek’s stage performance was just as sexy as his private dance, though obviously way less intimate. It was impossible for Gage to not get turned on by watching him on stage. He wanted to feel that body on his again, but minus his own clothes. Jarek still made Gage feel like the dance was entirely for him without even touching him. He worked the pole like he was born to it and his dancing was fluid and incredibly suggestive.
Jarek ended the dance in only his g-string and Gage realized he hadn’t even noticed when more clothes came off throughout the routine. Gage could hear other patrons cheering around him, whistling at Jarek as he left the stage. Gage watched him until Jarek disappeared backstage. He drank down the rest of his root beer while trying to calm himself down.
Jarek quickly wiped himself down with baby wipes backstage to get most of the oil off of his skin. He changed into his street clothes and waited patiently for his schedule for the upcoming week. His cut from tonight’s entertainment would be deposited to his account tomorrow.
Jarek emerged from backstage into the club instead of taking his usual exit through the outside door and looked around for Gage. When he spotted him, he went up to him and took his arm, nodding toward the two glasses in front of Gage at the bar. “Feeling kinda thirsty tonight, Elder Belford?” he asked quietly with a smirk.
“Nervous energy,” Gage admitted with a smile. “You don’t have to call me Elder anymore though. I’m about to be disgraced in my church, and will likely end up excommunicated by the end of this. I’m only an Elder while actively in the mission.”
Jarek laughed but nodded, not wishing to offend him. He led the way out of the club and continued to walk arm-in-arm with Gage all the way back to the house, stopping occasionally to back him up against a convenient wall to kiss him. Gage would always kiss back with equal enthusiasm, like he had been waiting for this for months, because he had.
When they finally got back to the house, Gage almost didn’t remember about his bag, realizing he’d left it in the back when Jarek came up for air from kissing him just long enough to unlock the door. When he remembered, he asked if he could grab his bag, and he smiled at the laugh from Jarek when he went out the backdoor instead to get it. Once his bag was by the door inside, he came back over to where Jarek was and kissed him again passionately, putting his arms around Jarek to pull him closer.
It took a little longer than it should have for them to get to the bedroom because they kept stopping to make out and take off a new article of clothing. It felt good to get out of the restrictive clothing that the missionaries had to wear, even if he wasn’t wearing it the way he was supposed to that night. That first feel of their naked chests touching made Gage moan in response. Another person’s touch had never felt this good before.
Jarek pushed Gage up against the doorframe to the bedroom and dropped to his knees to help him out of his pants and briefs.
“I should shower before we do anything,” Gage told Jarek. “We walked all around today, plus walking to your house and then to your work. I didn’t shower before I left, but I’m not against you helping me if there’s room for it here.”
“Oh, we’re definitely showering first,” Jarek agreed, kissing Gage’s cock on the slit. “I hate the feeling of the oil on my skin when I lay in my bed.”
“I wouldn’t know what that’s like but I never liked laying in bed when all sweaty from sports, so I think I kind of get it,” Gage replied, and then smirked at Jarek, that mischievous look coming back to his face. “With how much fun you seemed to be having, should I learn to pole dance?”
“I strongly recommend it. It’s fun, but it takes some effort to get to a place where it feels as effortless as it usually looks in clubs. I have a practice pole set up in the office,” Jarek responded.
“I’m no stranger to hard work. You don’t get as good at dirt biking as I am without it,” Gage replied, and then his face fell for a moment as he thought of all of his equipment and bikes back at home that he’d never see again. He let himself feel the loss of that and then shook his head to get back to the moment and smiled at Jarek. “Show me your shower?”
“Right this way,” Jarek said, grabbing his cock and leading him to the bathroom.
Gage chuckled and followed him. He loved being able to see this playful side of Jarek that went beyond what he had ever gotten to see before. He thought he was starting to understand why his brother took the path he did now. It seemed he had truly been in love with Rick, which was tragic to Gage. How could love be a sin? Isn’t love what God had always wanted them to find and cherish? Tonight he had made a choice to walk away from everything he’d known his entire life, but seeing Jarek like this was more than worth it.
Jarek could tell that by the time they had gotten into the bathroom and gotten the water warmed up, Gage had fallen into some deep thought. “You know,” Jarek said, “If you’re not ready for this, we can stop at any time.”
That broke Gage out of his thoughts as he looked over at Jarek. He shook his head. “It’s not that. I’ve just…a lot has happened in the last few weeks. It’s kind of changed how I’ve looked at my life and what I thought were supposed to be my morals. I was just wondering if this is how my brother felt with his boyfriend when they were together. If it was, I’m not sure I see how that’s a sin.”
Jarek gently pulled Gage into the shower and under the shower head. “Is that everything that’s been going through your mind? We can certainly talk about all of this,” he said.
Gage let the warm water relax his body as he considered that. “My brother committed suicide because our family couldn’t accept him.”
Jarek’s face fell. “Oh Gage, I’m so sorry. If I had known, I wouldn’t have tried to seduce you.”
Gage brought his hand up to caress Jarek’s cheek while he shook his head. “No, it’s fine. I’m sure you’ve noticed I’ve been off for a little while, but I got a letter delivered from him by his boyfriend today. It kind of puts things into perspective for me. I told him about you, before he killed himself, and he had some advice to leave with me. He told me I should follow my heart instead of our family. So, that’s what I’m doing.”
“Aww, and your heart led you to the strip club?” Jarek said with a wink.
Gage laughed at that. “Something like that. More like the guy in it led me there, anyway.”
“Oh! Did I get in the way? Long Schlong Johnson is rather pretty…” Jarek teased, lathering up a loofah and motioning for Gage to turn around so he could wash his back and get a good look at his ass. All of that walking and biking had been good for that ass and Jarek greatly appreciated that for his own personal reasons.
Gage turned his head back to smirk at Jarek. “Is he? I only seemed to notice you all night. At least, I don’t remember putting anyone else’s dick in my mouth.”
“Hey, I did take my eyes off of you for a solid two minutes,” Jarek said, “Who knows what you ex-Mormon boys get into when you start hitting the root beer.”
“Just wait, next week I’ll be willing to try caffeine for the first time in my life,” Gage joked. “Was Long Schlong the guy on the stage right before you? He seemed skilled but nowhere near as sexy as you.”
“Oh, no, that was Dong Henry. LSJ was on stage while we were having your private dance,” Jarek laughed.
Gage turned back around once the water washed away the remaining soap on his back and got a serious look on his face. “Are you sure you want to deal with all the bullshit that comes with letting an ex-Mormon boy live with you after he ran from his mission? I don’t imagine this is the last of the drama. My parents are going to lose it.”
Jarek appeared to consider that a moment. “Honestly?” he asked, lathering up Gage’s front side while he put together what he wanted to say. “I was happy being a single slut when we met, but all that changed when you started coming around. I found I didn’t get as much enjoyment out of meaningless hookups and wanted something more substantial.” Jarek shrugged, saying, “I guess I grew out of my slut phase.”
“I don’t know what I did to change your mind on that, but I’m not going to complain,” Gage replied while taking the loofah from Jarek to start washing the oil off of his body. “I could have only imagined being with someone like you back when I was in Utah. I did a good job of ignoring being gay for the most part, but it was hard to ignore here. It was impossible to ignore it around you.”
Jarek reached behind Gage and pulled the shampoo off of its perch on the tiny corner shelf built into the shower wall. He offered it to Gage. “Frankly, you existed. I found you endearing and when you seemed to have more to you than the usual Doorknockers who come around here periodically I felt drawn to you. As I got to know you, I found hooking up less and less interesting.”
Gage let the water wash away the shampoo before putting some conditioner through his hair and looking at Jarek again. “So, all that to say that we’ll deal with whatever happens from this together?”
“Yes,” Jarek answered simply, taking the loofah and lathering himself up the rest of the way.
Gage was silent as he took that in. He wasn’t sure that he was worth all of that trouble, but he wasn’t about to talk Jarek out of it if he wanted Gage to stick around. He waited until Jarek was done with the soap before he got some shampoo on his hands and lathered it into Jarek’s hair gently. He took care in getting it all rinsed out before massaging some conditioner in. When Jarek looked up at him while the conditioner was rinsing out, Gage leaned down and kissed him, putting everything he couldn’t quite say yet into the kiss.
They didn’t stop kissing until the water started to get a little cool. Jarek finally pulled away and said, “Me too.”
They turned off the water and got out of the shower, drying off before heading to the bed. Any other thoughts Gage had been having were pushed aside in favor of being present with Jarek right then. Jarek paused before getting into his sex drawer. “We don’t have to do this right now, Gage. We can hold off until you’re sure and we can just cuddle and talk tonight if that’s what you need,” he reiterated.
Gage smiled at that, considering teasing Jarek a little but he loved how sweet and genuine he was being. He kissed Jarek again, heatedly, before backing away just a little bit. “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”
Jarek nodded and pulled condoms and lube out of the drawer, setting them on the nightstand next to the bed. He pushed Gage down into a seated position on the bed and smoothly dropped to his knees between Gage’s thighs. Gage’s breath caught in his throat as he looked down at Jarek on his knees. He almost couldn’t believe that this amazing and gorgeous man was there with him of all people like this, and not just for a one night stand.
Jarek leaned forward and licked the head of Gage’s rapidly hardening cock seductively before taking just the tip into his mouth, sucking while licking the slit up and down and gently grazing the glans with his teeth. Gage let out a groan of pleasure at the sensations. It was more intense than he was expecting and felt far different than the one time he had let a woman try going down on him, probably because she wasn’t experienced in it and she didn’t excite Gage the way Jarek did.
Jarek smiled to himself and took another inch into his mouth, licking and sucking and caressing the glans with his tongue. He monitored Gage’s reactions to make sure he was enjoying himself and every time Gage made eye contact Jarek pulled another inch into his mouth. Gage ran his hand through Jarek’s short, curly hair and moaned out in pleasure.
Jarek eventually, torturously, got every inch into his mouth and throat and started mercilessly swallowing to stimulate the head of Gage’s penis. Worse, he was looking directly into Gage’s eyes, holding eye contact as he fondled his lover’s balls. Gage swore out loud and gave Jarek a warning that he was going to cum if he kept that up.
Jarek paused his swallowing just long enough for Gage to wonder if he was going to pull back before he started doing it again with the same intensity as before. Gage surprised himself by crying out as he came, his hand gripping Jarek’s hair harder as he shot down Jarek’s throat. He only loosened his grip as he started to come down from the orgasm, and he laid back on the bed to catch his breath.
Meanwhile, Jarek let Gage’s softening cock slither out of his mouth and smiled broadly. He sat on the bed next to Gage’s prone form and waited for him to recover. Gage smiled up at Jarek and moved back on the bed so he was more in the middle before he pulled Jarek in so he was laying on top of Gage and they could kiss again. Jarek smiled and kissed Gage deeply. Gage wrapped his arms around Jarek’s shoulders and let out a quiet moan into the kiss at the feeling of their naked bodies pressing against each other.
“So,” Jarek began, “was it everything you thought it would be?”
“I don’t think there’s anyone with a good enough imagination to know how that would be the first time,” Gage replied. “So, it was beyond my expectations.”
“Aww, my adorable virgin,” Jarek teased.
Gage laughed at that. He looked down at his CTR ring, fiddling with it for a moment before he took it off and threw it towards where the trash can was. Then he turned to Jarek, running his hand along Jarek’s side. “The virgin thing isn’t a big turn off for you?”
“Not really,” Jarek admitted. “There are some who feel like being with a virgin means you can mold them into what you want, but I feel like that’s manipulative. I tend to think more along the lines of I get the opportunity to open your eyes to new things.”
“You’ve definitely done that,” Gage told him with a smirk on his face.
“Good,” said Jarek. “Ready for bed? I promise the morning sex will be much better than whatever I manage tonight.”
“Yeah, it’s been a long day, and I’m exhausted.” Gage emphasized that by putting his arm over his eyes to block out the light and dramatically claim the day was done. Jarek chuckled and got up to turn the lights off and tidy up the room some before putting his shorts back on and climbing back into bed.
Gage decided to just stay naked to sleep, reveling in the freedom to do as he wanted for once. Once Jarek was back in the bed, they snuggled up against each other until they managed to relax enough to sleep.