“We’re fucked, huh?” Marcus asked.
“Yep,” Xane said with mock-cheer. “Fucked in the ass. And we love it.”
Marcus sighed. “Should have asked for more nectar. Chay, can you call Gallant when were back home? I need it bad.”
Chay shrugged. “I’d rather finish the job right away. The overcastle has to be in shambles right now. Should be easy.”
Xane clapped his hands, hopping eagerly. “Your call, boss. At least we know there’s no demon there anymore.”
===***===
The dead Wretcher’s castle was under a few minor sieges. Various factions were trying to partition the demon’s possessions or claim the castle, while Fno’Xhaan’s allies tried to keep it locked up for his possible resurrection after a few centuries.
Goro was bald yet again. Xane looked bald through illusion and could keep Marcus light hair invisible the same way as long as they nearly touched.
The pantheon approached over a bone bridge until their aegises glowed.
“There’s a few Daemon Fiends,” Chay said, gesturing at the specks of red — muscle packed, horned, winged men in robes or armor. “Probably here on behalf of some lord, or looking to make a name for themselves.”
“Why aren’t they just breaking in?” Marcus asked, pressing his body into Xane’s, who was pressed into Chay in turn.
“They’re in a complex balance of alliances and such,” Chay said. “Don’t have time to suss it all out but they don’t want all-out war, just to share the spoils.”
“How do we get in?” Goro asked.
“Working on it,” Chay said.
“Wait,” Xane said. “Piss first.”
Chay stepped forward. “Same.”
“Uh,” Xane made. “Sorry Marky-boy, but you gotta stay in range or I’ll have to redo the illusion.”
Marcus threw a middle finger at the thaum-mage but didn’t say anything.
Chay pulled the fundoshi aside and instantly regretted not taking it off. The wild spray went everywhere, running down his legs and off the bridge, where it dripped down into the glowing lake. The fundoshi got soaked.
His friends had to stay next to each other. Their splattering streams went wild. Their hands under their faces for protection, the sweating hunks had to accept getting sprinkled by each other.
While the literally pissed demigods bantered, Chay puppeteered a lone Aeobold to their position and a minute later the pantheon marched straight at the castle, looking dead inside like Shades so nobody paid them any mind. Chay overlaid thin little clouds that dimmed the occasional glow of their packages whenever a Fiend zoomed past overhead.
The random Aeobold didn’t have a key for the slave delivery side entrance but Goro’s hands bent the lock aside with a few pulls, then crushed the winged Kobold who was no longer needed.
Alone in the cave-like corridor, the four demigods spread out, illusions dropping.
Goro activated his mania-power to heal his hair back into existence and tied it up with the bead string.
“All right,” Chay said. “I think we need to go… three floors up. Whoever finds the stairs gets first dibs on the next cock, hehe.”
They walked through a few antechambers where the winding corridors branched, encountering no one but Gnomes that scrambled out of their way.
Chay kept an eye on the Gnomes. There were patterns to their movement, which told him things such as-
“Someone’s coming this way,” Chay said. “And fast. This isn’t a search party, I think the Gnomes figured out we’re aberrant slaves.”
The battle-ready men came face to face with an Aeodrake. The winged, brown dino had two horns — a biceratops? His tall, muscular body blocked the tunnel effectively. He was nude, his enviably big dick and balls dangling distractingly.
He pointed at them. “You!” he said in pandemonic, “You killed the lord. And you’re back for loot.”
Chay had instantly analyzed the situation. The Drake had been close to the lord, but not liked him much, only liked the power that came with a high position. He wasn’t too mad at them, mostly surprised, a little afraid, and surely interested in advantageous deals.
The Thai leader stepped forward and gestured his friends to stand down. His human body wasn’t a match for the four armed dino-man but he presented his buff, glistening strength with confidence, wrapped into a mist-cloak.
“That was us,” he said in ceiling dialect Boldian, “but that was a professional mission, as is this. We need the amber seed. Nothing more.”
The Drake took a few seconds to get over his surprise. He put a hand up to his chin, supporting the elbow with the other hand of the same side. “Nothing more, huh? The seed isn’t something I planned to hold onto.”
“And if Fno’Xhaan returns,” Chay said with a calming voice, “his pet project would be long gone either way. An amber seed doesn’t make much of a negotiation chip. Maybe we can help with something here.”
That was what the reptilian guy had wanted to hear. Chay had just won a free ticket to anywhere in the castle. They could kill him if he asked for too much payback.
“Shadowhand,” the winged Drake introduced himself. “Former lieutenant of Lord Fno’Xhaan.”
“Chay. Demigod.”
Shadowhand looked down at himself. Chay had controlled his gaze but the others had kept glancing at the displayed manhood (dino-hood?) with barely hidden emotions.
The Aeodrake smirked which looked rather threatening. “I was asleep when your intrusion was reported. Follow me, strange little figments.”
The bi-horned monster went to grab a flimsy loincloth and a black bident from his chamber.
A few flights of stairs and several Hellion-manned checkpoints later, the demigods were led past a gate adorned with gold thorns, close to the throne room entrance.
It was guarded by what Chay had first through were bodybuilders before he noticed they were too broad and buff to be human. And a little too green. The Trolls were wrapped in leather armor, their bronzed skin bulging from every crack with flexing fibers. Their dicks were in leather thongs so comically bulbous, Chay would have called it overcompensation if he hadn’t know the size of Troll dicks.
They moved past the highly important room’s door, to an adjacent one.
Parchments, gems and knick-knacks filled the iron shelves and bone tables.
“Shadowhand? Would you mind,” Xane said, “if we grabbed a bit of tablecloth?”
The creature shrugged. “Help yourself. The amber seed is somewhere in here. I’ll keep an eye on you while you look. But I’m not touching anything. Fno’Xhaan may have cursed a few things.”
Chay could tell Shadowhand didn’t really believe that and was messing with them. He just started searching. He kept an eye on the reptile as he did so.
Goro was ripping red cloth into stripes and twisted new fundoshi for them. The others helped with the search. Their crotches glowed, probably from demons flying by outside.
“What’s that ring?” Marcus asked.
Chay regretted not giving his teammates more consideration. Of course Marcus had also noticed that Shadowhand kept touching one particular ring on his hand. Chay hadn’t figured out what it was but it had to be a security feature. It looked pretty much identical to the one Chay was wearing that contained Pie. Angelic design?
The Drake raised the ring as if seeing it for the first time. “Oh, one of Fno’Xhaan’s gifts. He got it during the attack from the holy spire. War spoils.”