“I’m going to check on Eoin.” Luke turned and fled.
~~~
Later that night, Luke was cleaning up after dinner while Jules gave Eoin a bath. Jules smiled as his son babbled on about his day, clearly happy about getting to spend time with Luke again. The kid seemed enamored by him. He could see why. Luke was the kindest, gentlest man he’d ever met. He was six feet tall with short black hair, a square chin, and a nose that was slightly too large. His mouth, almost always curved up in a smile, was just the right size for his face. And his eyes… Luke’s eyes were the darkest shade of blue they could be without looking black. They were actually kind of mesmerizing if you stared into them…
“Daddy, that’s big people shampoo,” Eoin said, bringing Jules out of his reverie.
“Hm?” He looked down and saw that he was holding the Men’s 3-in-1. “Sorry, kiddo. Daddy’s mind was wandering. Lay down and get your hair wet.”
Jules grinned when his son closed his eyes, took a big breath of air, held his nose, and lay down, letting the water rush over his face. He set down the adult shampoo and grabbed the Burt’s Bees Baby Bee Tear Free Shampoo & Wash. He poured some into the palm of his hand just as Eoin emerged from the water. By now Eoin new the drill. He tilted his head back and closed his eyes and Jules lathered the shampoo into the boy’s short dark brown hair.
“Daddy, can Luke stay the night with us? Please?” Chuckling softly, Jules said, “Don’t you ever get tired of asking the same question night after night?”
A pause, then, “No. I want Luke to stay the night with us. Please, Daddy? Please?”
Sighing in defeat, Jules said, “If I say okay, you have to go to bed at your normal bedtime, in your own bed, without arguing. Got it?”
“Yeah! I pwomise!”
“Good, now close your eyes and mouth so I can rinse your hair.”
Jules finished bathing his son, then wrapped him in a towel and rubbed him down. When he thought Eoin was dry enough, he sent him to his room to get his pajamas on. He let the water out of the tub, put the bath-time toys up, and hung the towel up to dry. After stalling as long as he could, he sighed and went to the kitchen. He really hoped Luke didn’t have to be anywhere tomorrow. Though it was unlikely, it wasn’t impossible.
Luke was standing at the double sink, his back to him, washing the last of the pans. The dishwasher was running, which meant it was full with the rest of the dishes. The man was damned proficient. Maybe he should hire Luke on as a maid? At the thought, an image of Luke in nothing but a maid’s costume appeared in his mind. One of those short dresses that barely covers a woman’s ass. Well, in this case, a man’s ass. Wait. What the hell was he thinking!? I’m straight, damned it! Why the hell am I picturing my best friend in hardly nothing?
Jules must have made some kind of noise, because Luke turned around, his usual smile on his face. “Hey. Eoin’s in bed already?”
“No. He should be getting dressed.”
“Ah. Well then, make yourself useful and wash the table.”
“Okay.” Jules went to the sink, grabbed the washcloth and went to the table and started wiping it down. “Eoin asks me every night if you can stay over. I finally cracked and said yes. So… If you’re not busy tomorrow…”
Grinning, Luke said, “Jules Callahan, are you trying to ask me to stay the night?”
Flushing, Jules said, “That’s not-I mean-Damned it, Luke! Get your mind out of the gutter! I’m not a fag like you!”
Luke’s eyes widened, and he opened his mouth, closed it, and opened it again. Finally, he shut his mouth without saying anything and turned back to the sink. He quickly washed the last pan, rinsed it, and put it in the dish drain. Jules sighed, knowing he had gone too far. He knew he’d hurt his best friend. He’d seen the hurt in Luke’s eyes.
“Look, Luke, I’m-”
“All dwessed, Daddy! Did you ask Luke yet?” Eoin asked as he flew into the kitchen. Jules saw Luke’s shoulders rise and fall as he took a deep breath. Luke’s arm went up, and Jules hoped like hell he wasn’t wiping away tears. Then Luke turned and knelt down to Eoin’s level, his ever-present smile in place.
“Your daddy said you want me to spend the night. I’ll accept just this once, but I have somewhere to be real early in the morning, so I might not be here when you wake up, okay?”
“Aw, but I want-”
“We can’t always get everything we want, Bud. If we did, then life wouldn’t be fun anymore. If I stay the night tonight, will you promise to stop asking your dad every night?”
Eoin nodded. “I pwomise.”
“Good. Now how about we roast some marshmallows until your bedtime?”
“Yeah!”
“I believe I saw some in the pantry, low enough for you to reach. Will you please go get them?”
“‘Kay!” Eoin left the kitchen.
“Luke, I’m-”
“Stop, Jules,” Luke said quietly. “I’ll stay the night for Eoin, but come morning, I think it’s best if we didn’t see each other for a while. You should have your mom or your brother watch Eoin if you need to go somewhere.”
“Luke? I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry. I was a jerk-”
“You’re sorry? You were a jerk? How many times in the last ten years have you caught me crying because some ‘jerk’ -your word- called me names? How many times have you stood up for me when all the other kids picked on me, calling me things like ‘fag’ and ‘homo’? And now you’re one of them!”
Jules’s heart lurched. He had to fix this. He knew a simple ‘I’m sorry’ wasn’t going to cut it. Not this time. In a moment of scared insecurity, he really had become the bad guy, and there was no excuse for that.
Fifteen minutes later, Eoin sat in front of the fireplace, holding the fire poker, a marshmallow on the pointed tip. Eoin put the tip into the fire, watching it roast. Luke was right next to him, showing him how to do it and laughing at Eoin’s innocent joy at the simple activity. When the first marshmallow was properly roasted, Eoin turned around to show Jules, his grin lighting up the room more than the fire. Jules had to admit that Luke was good with the kid. Gentle and patient. Eoin obviously adored the man.
And so do I…
The thought startled him. Did he? Did he adore Luke? Come to think of it, he probably did. He always asks Luke to babysit before his family. He never minds it when Luke cleans his room. Or the rest of his house. In fact, Luke was just like a wife, and a lot of the time, Jules treated him as such, without the physical part, obviously.
But why not the physical part, too?
Why indeed. Jules paused, mentally shook his head, and examined the last few thoughts. Why not the physical parts, too? Well, because he wasn’t gay. Was he? He didn’t think so. He didn’t get hard thinking of other men. His heart never raced when Luke was around, and he never fantasized about Luke sexually.
“Daddy, aren’t you going woast mawshmellows, too?” Eoin asked, breaking into Jules’s musings.
“Yeah, I think I will.”
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