Latest gay erotic stories: U-N-I Ch – Chapter 1.1
But even though he was this confident guy out in public, I knew that sometimes he was just putting on a show, not to let people know how he really felt, which he still does 10 years later. He was really good at that but I could see through him. I think I was probably the only person he felt comfortable enough with to be completely himself. He always acted differently around me. He was more shy and reserved. He was not joking around as much, he was more serious and sincere and, well, himself! I knew sides of his personality like his doubts, fears and insecurities that few people knew about, probably not even his mother.
And that night, all I could see was how much he cared for me and it was a bit unsettling. I had been feeling a bit weird and awkward around him lately. Something had changed in his attitude, he was overprotective of me, he always wanted to hang out, always wanted me to stay the night, never wanted me to go home. I knew he was worried that something would go wrong with my dad and that I had better stay away from him, but I was starting to feel that there might be more than that.
We went to his room after dinner but we didn’t study again. We had a quick shower, played video games for a bit and then a bit of guitar. Around 11pm, I stopped and went to bed while he was still playing, and I started to wonder how I was going to ask him what I wanted to ask him.
Again, the whole evening had been weird, we had barely talked to each other but we had done a lot of talking with our eyes, there was a sort of…connection between us that I had been feeling more and more. It was becoming stronger and stronger every day. We never felt the need to talk non-stop when we were together. We always had something to talk about though but sometimes we just hung out silently together. The silence between us was always a comfortable one. It was never awkward.
Rob soon joined me on the bed and after a few seconds, he sort of snuggled up to me. I had my back to him, he was not really touching me, but he was lying close enough so that I could feel his breath and his body on me, and it felt good. Too good.
I was straight, I was dating Rachel, but when I was around Rob, especially at night like this, I had started feeling mixed emotions. I had often felt like I wanted to put my arms around him, or kiss the back of his neck, or even his lips, caress his skin, and I would often get hard thinking about doing that. I knew why I was feeling this way. And I could tell that Rob wanted to be close to me, all the time. He was not seriously dating any girl, and yet, he was spoilt for choice. He didn’t talk to me about girls and quickly changed the subject whenever I did. And I was starting to wonder if he might not just be gay. And for some reason, which I really didn’t understand, I was quite turned on by this. Maybe I was totally wrong though, and I couldn’t bring myself to ask him.
But at that moment, I kind of just wanted to turn around and take him in my arms. I didn’t know what was happening to us.
“Rob?”
“Yeah”
“You’re still awake?”
“You know that was just me talking” he joked
I had to give a small chuckle. I turned around to face him. “I mean, do you wanna sleep, are you tired, or can we talk about something?”
“Well, we can talk. What about?”
“I’m not sure, I just…I just feel…You know what, forget it, let’s just sleep.” I said, not finding the right words to ask him and backing down.
“No tell me, what is it? I’m gonna make you tell me now anyway” he insisted and I decided to just say what was on my mind.
“I was wondering…how do you feel about girls?” I asked him
“I, well, why are you asking me this?”
“because, I don’t know, you don’t seem very interested. You haven’t been with anyone for a while. Like you don’t care. You only want to be with me.”
“I just, I just like hanging out with you, playing music, I don’t …” and he sighed and stopped talking.
He sat up on the bed and I did too. I just looked at him and waited for him to say something or to look at me, but he didn’t. He couldn’t.
“Rob, you can tell me, you know, you can tell me anything, I’m your best friend” I said in a reassuring tone of voice.
He raised his head and his eyes met mine. They were a bit wet and I could see fear in them. I just stared at him and tried to give him strength. He knew what I was waiting for him to say. But he didn’t say anything, and there were more tears filling up his beautiful eyes.
“Are you gay?” I asked, but it was not really a question.
He took a deep breath and looked down again. He wiped his eyes a little. After a moment, he spoke.
“What if I am!” he said with confidence in his voice again.
“I don’t care. It doesn’t change anything. I just wanna know.”
“I don’t think I can talk to you about this.”
“Why not? We’ve always told each other everything.”
“This is different. How did you figure it out?”
I was silent for a moment. I wasn’t sure how to answer. I tried to gather my thoughts and answered ” because you’ve been acting differently around me. You look at me differently, you smile at me differently.”
“Alright stop, I get it. I thought I was being more subtle than this.”
“I know you. You can’t fool me. I can read you like an open book.”
More silence.
He wasn’t talking so I tried to make him talk.
“Have you ever been with a guy?” I asked
“Yeah” he softly answered.
“Really? who?” I asked, surprised. Now, I was curious.
“A couple of guys in Dublin… and you know, Charlie, from school?”
“Charlie, yeah… no way, he’s gay?!” I asked a bit stunned.
“Yeah, very!” He answered, laughing a little.
My mouth dropped open and I chuckled. I actually thought that was kind of hot, as I pictured them briefly together.
“Damn!”
He smiled at me and he was trying to relax a little. There was no more fear in his eyes and I guess he could tell that I was not freaked out and that I was not going to weird out on him.
“He doesn’t look gay or act gay at all” I said, still a bit surprised.
“Well, neither do I… ”
“That’s true.” I looked at him and noticed again how masculine he looked, he had a great body, tanned skin, dark hair, a noticeable six pack and strong arms. A deep voice, sometimes I could sense just by hearing a gay guy talk that he was gay, but not him. He was very attractive. And I couldn’t help but notice that I did find him attractive. I felt weird about those feelings I had for him. I really thought of myself as straight, but Rob had made me feel such strong mixed emotions lately that I just didn’t know what to think. That was the reason why I had to bring up the subject of his sexuality. I had to know exactly what was going on between us, why I felt a bit turned on when I was lying close to him in bed. I was scared to bring it up though. He had already told me about being gay, I wasn’t sure he was ready to tell me how he felt about me, but I kind of knew he had to feel more than friendship for me. It was obvious to me now.
He looked briefly into my eyes, but looked away, and sighed, ill-at-ease.
“Is he, like, your boyfriend? I’ve never really seen you hang out with him.”
“No, I never do. We just get together once in a while, it’s just sex. He’s fun”
“I see!”
I sighed. “Must be hard to keep this to yourself.” He looked at me and shrugged.
“Do you need a hug?”I said to lighten up his mood.
He laughed.
“Sure!” he shrugged.
I sort of wrapped my legs around him, but not too tight, and held him against me. He rested his forehead on my shoulder and sighed. We didn’t move, we didn’t speak a word, we just enjoyed the closeness and again, I felt how connected we were.
After a moment, he started to hold me tighter and drew my body closer to his. He clung onto me, our bodies quite close to each other, our t shirt covered chests pressing together. I felt his breathing change and I knew he was crying a little.
“Don’t cry, man, it’s ok!”
I continued holding him for a while. He dried his eyes and and kept his tight grip on me. When his breathing returned to normal, he raised his head a little and I felt his lips on my ear. “I love you…I love you so much it hurts.”
I froze, I hadn’t expected him to say that. But I felt a wave of lust rush through me hearing him whisper those words in my ear.
“I… I know, I kinda figured” I said in a whisper.
He looked at me. I could see so many emotions in those beautiful eyes of his. It felt more like he was looking into me again, I don’t know how to explain it, it was like he was trying to see into my soul, to read my mind, and he said softly,”I know you’re straight. I know I can’t have you. I just don’t wanna lose your friendship. But I had to tell you. Don’t weird out on me ok, please!” he begged.
“I won’t » I promised him. But I knew something was going to change, things could not be the same. Because I knew I was probably going to act on those feelings I had. I was turned on, I was sexually curious, and I felt attracted to him. I briefly thought about Rachel, but I knew she would not find out about this. And I really didn’t know what was going to happen anyway.
“I was scared of telling you I was gay, how do you feel about it?”
“I don’t know, I had never really thought about it until I started suspecting you might be. How long have you known?”
“I think I’ve always known” he answered. “But I guess it became clear to me when I was 13. I’ve always been more attracted to boys. I don’t feel anything for girls, I don’t want to kiss or have sex with a girl. But I’m turned on when I see a hot guy” he smiled
“How long have you had feelings for me?” I blurted out
“Don’t make me say it!” he said, shaking his head.
“How long?” I insisted.
He shrugged. “Since I was 13!” he admitted and I took a deep breath.
“but the last couple of years have been really hard” he admitted.
“and you would let me sleep in your bed, and not say anything?”
“I couldn’t say anything. I was happy you were with me, even if I couldn’t touch you. I liked having you close to me. I didn’t want to lose your friendship, you’re too important to me” he paused.
“Mark… I don’t want this to make you stop coming over. If you need to get away from your place, please, still come over here. You don’t have to worry about me or what I feel, I’ll get over it. Actually I’m glad you know, it will make things easier for me, and you can just tell me to stop if you feel uncomfortable or if I’m getting too close to you”
He looked at me intensely. “Promise me!”
I looked deep into his eyes. I knew I felt something for him that was going beyond friendship. I knew I loved him. But I wasn’t gay. … or was I? Did I just want to try? Was this just lust? This could ruin everything between us. What if I was just curious but I realized I didn’t like it. I couldn’t do that to him. Let him have me just once and then tell him that I was not interested.
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